Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Good-Bye Ernesto Hello Exercise!

Since waking up Monday to the news that Ernesto was coming, I've been running around cleaning the house, getting laundry done, washing every dish in the house, gasing up my car, getting a few groceries, and typing away like a mad-woman to get all my web writing done just in case the power were to go out.

Of course, thankfully, Ernesto has not been that bad. In fact, for whatever reason he decided to spare us here in Port St. Lucie, and we have been getting the occassional pocket of high wind and rain but nothing like we were expecting even as a tropical strom. And, knock on wood, we've had no power outages.

With all this running around the house, I have not had time to do my regular running, or actually, my walking and I really feel it. We are expecting more rain throughout the weekend, but this shows me that I really need a plan B. Where oh where is the Walk Away the Pounds DVD I ordered Amazon?

Yes, I do have other exercise videos, and obviously, it is time to break one of those out, but, still, even with DVDs and videos, one of the things I enjoy about my walk is getting out of the house. I tend to be a major home-body. In fact, I actually get a little OCD sometimes when I have to leave for my crap-job or even take a few hours away from home to run errands. What if the house burns down while I'm gone? What if someone tries to break in? What if? What if? Lots of stupid stuff like that.

Getting out of the house, even though it's down the block a little, helps me clear my head, not just my arteries. Walking is easy too. I manage to sweet (boy, howdy do I) and get my heart rate up, but I don't have too much trouble with injuries (which I used to have all the time when I ran many years ago). Plus, it's very low tech. You just need some decent tennis shoes, but other than that, throw on some grubby clothes, grab your cell phone/walkman, and you're set.

Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully, we will see enough sunshine so I can get a walk in. If not, then I have the following exercise videos to choose from: yoga, ballet, and aerobics. Which will it be? I'll keep you posted.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Fresca and Sodium

I recenlty posted about soda and sodium and how you have to watch the sodium content on diet drinks.

Well, I took another look at my liter of Fresca the other day and realized it does have sodium, though only 25mg a serving.

I was under the impression it didn't have any, so I thought I should correct myself here.

Of course, again, 25mg is pretty punnie compared with some diet drinks that have 65 to 70mg, but some people can be very sensitive to sodium.

If you notice things like your fingers or feet swelling after a salty meal or an extra few pounds gained in one day, then this could be caused by water weight which could be caused by the salt contained in what you ate.

Us fatand40 folks have enough to deal with when it comes to extra weight. We sure don't need to gain water weight!

(picture from zenandjuice.com)

Monday, August 28, 2006

Hurricane Weight Gain

We are waiting for Ernesto. Today I went by the grocery store to pick up a few things. We really didn't need much, and since we have a generator, we should be able to keep most of the food in the frig in case we lose power. But, since I usually go shopping mid-week, we were out of a few things, and after the storm, the stores tend to be bare, so I dragged myself in there.

I managed to lose pound number 2 per my weigh in today, but I really need to be on guard now with the hurricane coming. I saw lots of folks stocking up on things like potato chips, bread, crackers, carbs, carbs, carbs. Fat, fat, fat, and it reminded me of 2004 when we had 2 storms hit our area. It was very easy to just eat as a way to bring some comfort to yourself. And, mainly, I ate junk.

Plus, while MREs (meals ready to eat) are tastey and very handy when you have no power, they are loaded with calories, at least 2,000. Preparing for me now includes thinking about the food I'll eat when the lights go out and the wind and rain starts up.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Diet Drinks and Sodium


My sodium intake is something I honestly never considered before until recently. I've lost the same spare tire about 3 times, and now on attempt number 4, I've begun to realize that sodium can be a real problem when in comes to retaining water weight. So, I'm starting to pay attention. (Yes, I know I'm slow, but better late than never.)

Diet soda and other diet drinks are one of those things I thought were really harmless until I read the side of a can or liter bottle. According to the About.com Nutrition site, the average can of diet soda has about 60mg of sodium. I know, not much, but add them up with all the other foods and beverages you eat throughout the day, and considering that the average person shouldn't have more than about 2,400mg, it's something to think about.

I even read in an article recently that diet soda drinkers tend to have a hirer risk of weight gain, though the medical community has no clue as to why.

I've never been a big drinker of sodas generally because of the carbonation. It bothers my stomache if I drink too much of it. I really prefer drinks like diet lemonades or other diet drinks that aren't carbonated. However, even those I noticed have about the same amount of sodium as diet sodas. My own perference for an oragne and red diet drink put out by Tropicana, which are yummy, have 70mg per serving.

Here are a few alternatives though. First, for those who like the fizz, check out good old Fresca. It tastes great and has zero calories and zero sodium. Another drink option, other than water of course, is the various flavors of Crystal Light available. Again, zero sodium.

Still, I think nothing can replace water, so I try to limit myself to a few glasses of diet beverages a day, and instead, do my best to drink tons of water with a lemon wedge for a little added flavor.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Fat Chick Get Hits by Lightening

I got rained out again today for my walk. I knew I should have gone earlier today, but it was so dang hot out! It is much nicer to go in the evenings because it's cooler and then I can just come home, take a shower, and get in my jams and I'm ready to chill for the evening. When I walk early in the day, the heat just sucks out any energy I have, and then I have a heck of a time recouping when I get home and getting any work done.

If you know anything about Florida, then you know it's not a good idea to go walking when it's raining or even looking like it might rain. We are the lightening capital of the world, and for good reason! I have tried braving it a few times, only to see a bunch of lighting and chickening out and high-tailing it home. I kept picturing the headlines in my local paper "Fat Chick Gets Hit by Lightening." And, of course, readers would say, "What the heck was she thinking? Good way to get healthy! Not."

To help with this walking and rain problem, I finally broke down and ordered a walking DVD. I know. It sounds stupid, but a number of women at my crap-job have raved about Walk Away the Pounds and some of Leslie Sansone's other DVDs, so I figured for $15 (including shipping) what the heck.

One good thing about this DVD (I borrowed one from one the gals at my crap-job) is that it doesn't take much room to do it. You walk, but you also do kicks, move side to side a little, squats, march, that kind of thing, so you only need a few feet of room to do it. This is good because I may need to watch it on my computer screen rather TV due to the fact that we only have one (working) TV in the house, and that TV is also in the room where my dogs hang out, and oh, they just love helping me exercise. Just try to downward facing dog with two 95 lbs dogs in your face.

Poor Nicole Richie


On my most recent trip to the grocery store, I was cruising the magazine racks looking for something interesting to read while I waited in the deli because you never know how long you will be there. That place is usully jamming. And I saw the most horrific picture on the front of some stupid tabloid of poor Nicole Richie, skin and bones!

My heart just went out to her. Here I am struggling with getting weight off and thinking sometimes how nice it would be to just have enough control so that I wouldn't eat for a few weeks so I'd get down to the next size before my dissertation defense, and then I saw her picture and realized that my problems are just so small compared to some people's.

According to one article that popped up on my Google Alerts, her dad didn't even realize what was happening to her:

He says, "I didn't even notice it at first, because when you see somebody so much, you don't see what other people see. "I asked her if she eats properly. I always made sure she ate when she was at our home. I couldn't see any strange eating habits. She ate fine. So, I stopped worrying. "And no, I don't smuggle sandwiches into her Gucci bags."

Now, I am in no way falting him. He's her dad, but she is an adult and from the rest of this short article it sounds like she obviously no longer lives at home.

This whole food issue things goes both ways. It is all a matter of control, either lack of or too much control!

Friday, August 25, 2006

The Lure of the Scale

I have found myself doing something this week that I know is a big "no-no" - weighing myself every day. It is a horrible, horrible habit and very hard to stop doing. It's sort of compulsive. I can't help myself. They (whoever "they" are) say you should weigh yourself once a week at the most.

I know that from day to day everyone's weight fluctuates, and with a digital scale, you actually get down to point whatever - 1XX.5; 1XX.2; and so on - so it really does nothing but drive me insane.

I originally started doing this because I thought it would be a good way to get my mind set for the day, sort of like posting here. You start the day off right with "I weigh this much, and I'm going to be good today no matter what temptation comes my way." But, in reality, it's more like "Damn! I was so good yesterday and I'm .4 pounds more than I was yesterday? What the h*ll?"

So, that is it! I am not going near that thing until Monday, which is supposed to be my normal weigh in day. That's just 2 days. I can handle 2 days. Sure, yes, I can.

As far as the diet, things have been okay this week. Yesterday was tough because I had to help set for a program at work and that meant putting out chips and cookies for the guests, which I didn't eat any of, but later I had the terrible munchies. I did munch, but luckily, I still managed to stay under my 1500 calorie mark for the day. Though I'm beginning to wonder if that is still too high for the sort of weight loss I need right now, those 10 lbs I need off by October. But, I'll wait to decide on Monday.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Costly Cantaloupe

The cantaloupes at the grocery store have been beyond horrid lately, and I have really missed eating them. Not only do they taste great, especially mixed in with some 2% cottage cheese, they are super duper low in calories.

Today, I saw a pile of beauties while shopping. But, of course, they were twice as much as I was paying for them before. $3 each!

I hesitated for a few moments and then realize that it was worth the $3 because (a) I like them; (b) they are good for me; (c) I can get a few meals/snacks out of just one.

This reminded me of one lesson I learned while on Weight Watchers. I normally didn't like to go to the meetings because they were usually full of people talking about how they had cookies hidden in their closets or how they got up at midnight and ate a gallon of ice cream or other way out there stories. But now and then, espeically if I was falling off the wagon, I'm make myself stay for a meeting, and very often, I'd learn a tid bit or two that I did find helpful.

At one of these meetings the instructor talked about how she loved red peppers (which give me the burps, ick), but they are so expensive. However, they are very good for you and hardly have any calories, so she treats herself to them now because she feels she is worth it. Her point was that sometimes good food is not cheap, but we are all worth a few extra dollars when it comes to our health.

So, buy the cantaloupe, red pepper, aspargus, whatever it is because we are all worth it.

Fatand40 Going Mainstream?

I'm considering a change to Fatand40 and I thought I'd consult my huge fan base here ;)

I have the opportunity to maybe (as in also maybe not) moving Fatand40 to a blog network. Here are some of the pros and cons as I see them.

Pros:


  • Possibly a little money. I have to put this up at the top of course, but we are talking "a little" as enough to keep me well stocked in Pria bars. It eventually could turn into more, but I have learned this isn't something to count on when it comes to writing on the web.
  • More readers and more incentive. As part of a network, you immediately increase your readership because each blog on the network is linked to each other. More readers would, for me, equal more incentive (or pressure depending on how you look at it) to lose weight.
  • Expanded weight loss and diet topic. Though I'll continue to journal my progress or at times lack of, I will also broaden my writing topics to cover more about wieght loss and diet. Being so into this now, I've been reading more and more about it, and really, it's always been a topic of interest to me, so I'd just share from what I've learned myself.

Cons:

  • Some loss of control. Of course, as with anything that you don't completely own yourself, there is a price to pay and with a blog that means that I would have to answer to someone else for a change. That means posting regularly (though I'm pretty prolific right now) and thinking about stuff like search engine optimization.
  • Being really out there. This is a public blog now, but with about the 6 people who actually read it, I feel pretty safe to talk about personal stuff. With more people reading, I wonder if I would start to censor myself more. Would I lose my "voice" so to speak?
  • Not an expert. I'm very much not an expert on this whole diet and exercise thing. Heck, if I was, I wouldn't have started writing about it in the first place. I'd be skinny and in great shape and wonder why everyone else was so fat. Again, with a larger readership I worry that people might expect me to be an expert rather than understand that I'm just like the average 40 something who will always have a battle with the bulge.

I'd really love your feedback on this. While money is always a good thing (those Pria bars aren't cheap!), I wouldn't be doing this for just money. Should I just stay here and be safe and keep it fun, which it is? Should I venture out? Am I insane for even thinking about it?

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

No Fat Chicks

Driving home today from shopping for some new walking sneaks and some other exercise clothes, which I was in dire need of, I passed a rust-bucket of a truck that said "No Fat Chicks" on the back.

Now, we are talking about a major crap car that you couldn't pay this fat chick to stick her pinky toe in. And, as I listened to my Cyndi Lauper CD, I thought about want an idiot must be driving that icky truck.

Why so much pressure on women to be skinny and not men?

I pictured the driver with a wad of chewing tobacco in is upper lip and a gut hanging over his greasy jeans. He wishes he could get a fat chick, any chick for that matter.

Why doesn't he just put a "I'm a Loser" sign on the back of his truck instead?

Monday, August 21, 2006

When the Body Says Nope

One thing that really sucks about getting old is the fact that your body just doesn't do what you want it to, what you used to do a million times before. Sometimes it just says, "U-u, nada, nope."

Since my getting back to my walking routine and adding crochet to the mix, my body has been very uncooperative.

I started seriously walking in Janurary, and while I did notice my body was extra cranky, I basically ignored it until recently when I couldn't walk for awhile and then started back again. When I wasn't walking, the crankiness stopped. No stiff hips, no stiff or pain in the feet. Now, it's all back. What gives? Here I am exercising regularly and my body is not a happy camper.

To top it off, my hands are having major carpel tunnel (did I spell that right?) to the point of numbness. Not good. I know this is due to the crochet. I do tend to have hand issues with all the typing and jewelry making I do, but not to this extent. Plus, I have had the same kind of thing happen in the past when I was waitressing. My hands would go totally numb and I'd lose control and drop stuff. It was like my brain was saying, "Pick up the plate." And the message just didn't make it to my fingers.

I have no way to remedy this for now. Really, just venting. It sucks getting old, but I so don't plan to stop doing either. So, Body, get ova it!

One Pound at a Time

It is now official. Since getting sick and having to restart my diet all over again, I finally got my first real pound off. Admittedly, it would probably have been 2 if it weren't for my party hardy attitude on Saturday, but I'm still happy to see one pound gone.

I've got plans to eat some fish today, red snapper, and even bake a potatoe, and use faux butter on it, so that's a nice low-cal lunch that should stick with me most of the day. I have noticed that if I make an effort to eat more protein I don't get so hungry.

Fingers crossed, it won't rain tonight and I'll manage to get another good walk in.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Birthday Party Report

Yesterday I finally had some good news from my scale, so the pressure was on to be good. And, I think I was pretty good at the party, though not fabulous. I wasn't eating carrot sticks all day, but I didn't go crazy either. Plus, when I got home not only did I go for a walk, though I really wanted to take a nap after all that driving, but I managed to walk for almost an hour versus my usual 30 minute deal. It's my goal to get up to an hour of walking a day, so this alone was very encouraging. Hopefully, I can do it again tonight after I get home from work.

Some of my strategies for the party worked, but they need some tweeking before I go to another party. My egg breakfast actually stuck with me, so I wasn't hungry when I got there and I barely ate any of my grapes even while I was driving. When I arrived, they were getting ready to cut the cake because my sister had sort of 2 shifts of guests, kids in the morning and immediate family in the afternoon. So I just ate a very small piece of cake, basically a few bites, but that was pretty much it until the rest of the guests left.

She didn't have the vegies plate like she usually did, but I brought a salad and low-cal dressing. This was a good idea actually. However, she didn't set it out until after the food on the grill was ready to eat, so by then I was getting kind of hungry and I ate a few wings and some fried shrimp she had out for us to snack on. Looking back, I should have asked to have the salad put out and maybe next time I'll bring extra plates for it so it could work as an appetizer too. I could have filled up on salad while I was waiting instead of wings and shrimp. I made a really large salad, so there was a lot left after we all ate. Thus, plenty of salad was there to eat before and during the meal.

I'm back on it today, and while I don't dare step on the scale right now, I know what I did last week was working, so I'm just going to keep doing it. Hopefully, Monday when I weigh myself, things won't be too bad from my Saturday splurge.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Mulling Over Birthday Party Strategies

So I'm thinking about how I'm going to handle this Saturday at the big birthday party of my soon to be 4 year old nephew. Planning is really important for me when it comes to stuff like this. If I don't have some kind of plan, then I totally fall apart when I go to stuff like this. And, I know my sister will have some great food there because she's a wonderful cook. She even blogs about food.

Here are some things I'm thinking of trying:

  • The real food won't show up until about 1 or 1:30pm, so I'm thinking of eating a high protein breakfast. Maybe a few eggs with some fat free cheese.
  • I love to munch while driving. In fact, much of this weight came from my 2+ hour commute to school over the past few years. Thus, I thought of bringing some grapes for the ride there, and maybe the way back too.
  • Another way to help the time go by while driving and stay distracted is a book on tape. I picked one up today, some comedian thing, but I may get another one just in case that one isn't as funny as it claims.
  • Eat a very small piece of cake. Yes, it is a birthday, so I have to have cake, but that doesn't mean I need a huge piece with ice cream on the side. A few bites...a few bites...keep telling myself that.
  • Fill up on veggie snacks and fruit. I know she'll have chips, dip, and a veggie plate and she also mentioned fruit. If I stay with the fruit and vegies I can still snack like everyone else. I just have to watch the chips and dip, which I can easily make a meal out of.

Hopefully, I'll think of more, but this is a start.

Why I'm Fat

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Yippy for Crochet!

It seems to be working, and honestly, I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed it. For the past 2 nights, I've picked up a skein of yarn rather than a bowl of pop corn, and it has helped curb my eating tremendously. If I do eat or drink anything, I wait until about 10 and maybe have a glass of wine and a bag of 100 calorie crackers, but I'm still staying well below my 1500 cal mark even with those.

On the down side, my fingers are getting more of a work out than usual since I'm often either typing all day and/or making jewelry, and I'm trying to explain to one of my dogs (Rocky, aka Boo-Boo) that a skein or ball of yarn is not a dog toy. But both are issues I think I can deal with.

I did splurge yesterday and went to Wally-World for some yarn, and I even bought a little book on making crochet purses, which I'm sure I'll never have time to do. I was a tad disappointed at the selection (or lack of) at W. I remember years ago they used to have a whole long wall full of yarn. Now, my local W is down to one short isle.

Along with crocheting instead of munching, my other strategy is to give C. a quick call around 8pm. This is my danger-zone time, and she also needs a pick me up around then herself, so it's a good way to help us both out and keep us on track for the evening. Last night, she was dining on fish and broccoli and had saved an apple for later that evening when her husband came home for his late dinner (since he had to work that night).

Hopefully, I can keep this up. I'm attending a birthday party on Saturday, so I'm worried about that, but I'm already starting to plan a little. I wonder if anyone will notice me sitting in a corner crocheting?

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Fatand40 Gets Press Coverage


Thanks to Hsien-Hsien Lei, PhD for featuring moi in A Hearty Life: Hearty Habits #11: Fat and 40

It feels weird that Fat and 40 me is in there, but if you read the rest of the info on this post, I guess I must be doing a little something right.

Lei posts tips now every Tuesday and Thursday, so sign up for her RSS feed or just remember to stop by regularly for some tips for keeping your heart healthy.

Learn to Crochet

I haven't posted in a while because basically, things have not been going well. And, as a result, I just got really frustrted and angry with myself. Now, it's not like I'm sitting down to a pint of ice cream every night, but it just boils down to lack of self control and eating when I don't need to do so.

I'm great during the day. The protein bars are good for keeping me until lunch. Even today, I managed to hold off and have a later than usual lunch. And, I'm walking again and eating fruits and vegies, but then by about 8pm that all goes out the window.

It starts, usually, with a glass of wine. Then some pop corn (air dried). Then maybe a few low-fat, low-cal crackers. Oh, yes, another glass of wine would be nice and so would a piece of cheese. Then next thing you know, I've racked up 400 or more caloires and honestly, I'm not eating because I'm hungry. I'm eating because it feels good after working all day to sit on my bum and munch and drink wine.

I wake up the next day totally pissed at myself for doing this and not an ounce lighter.

I called C. today and talked with her about it, and she is having similar problems only she is exercising like a maniac, so this makes her hungry. But eating when you are hungry makes sense. Eating just to eat does not.

For herself, she turned back to her food journal and realized she wasn't eating as much fish (which is loaded with protein) and a few other items that she, for whatever reason, hadn't been eating in awhile, so she's going to try adding those back to her diet.

She assumed at first that I too was hungry because usually by 8pm, my calorie count is pretty low, like anywhere from 1000 to 1400 at the most. But I'm not as active as she is. I sit all day typing and go for one 30 minute walk. That is just not the same as going to an aerobics class in the morning and then playing racket ball in the afternoon.

But, C. did come up with something that may help - crochet.

I basically need something to occupy myself when I'm relaxing in front the TV, but it can't be something too involved because I am pretty tired usually after working all day (who isn't, right?) I make jewelry and bead for a living and write about it, but that is the kind of thing that I need to pay attention to when I'm doing it. Crochet just takes a big hook and a roll of yarn and then I'm good to go.

I'm going to try it tonight. If it is successful, I may brave the Waly-World crowd tomorrow and splurge on some nice yarn.

Maybe I'll start a new diet trend - The Afghan Diet: Crochet Your Way to a Thinner You.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Powerful Bars

I've been using the power bars, in particular I like Pria bars, and so far, so good. For breakfast, they work really well because they keep me full until lunch. This is even true after my morning walk, which is amazing because I'm usually starving since it's about 100 degrees outside right now.

Yesterday, I had one in the morning for breakfast and it really kept me until a 1pm lunch. Then I had one around 5 or so (along with some grapes), and that gave me enough energy to go for a walk in the evening (since I couldn't take one that morning).

A few things to keep in mind, though, for anyone thinking of giving these a try. First, make sure you drink a lot of water or similar liquids. I eat one for breakfast and drink a small pot of black tea with it and then also at least a large glass of water after that. This helps keep you full also and from having any possible stomache problems, which leads me to the next issue with these guys, bathroom time, and a fair amount of it. And, I don't just mean a number 1, if you know what I mean. This is also one reason I try not to eat one after 5pm.

I prefer the Pria because they taste good, but they also have fewer calories than most of the other protein bars I've found. Of course, there's a trade off because they also have less protein (5g) than these bars too. If I were a body builder, this might be more of an issue for me. But, I'm using these for weight loss (hopefully), and I'm also interested in addng more protein to my diet because I don't eat much meat.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Two Months

I had lunch with C. yesterday at Crispers, and told her my issue about how the disseration defense is going to be a few months sooner than I had expected. Luckily, on the writing front, I'm in good shape. On the fat front, well, my shape is pretty much the same.

She agreed that there was no way, short of lipo, that I'd lose the original weight I had in mind (about 30 lbs) in just a few months. However, she thinks I could lose 10 lbs by early October, and so that's my new goal, at least for now. Basically, I'm going to try to stay around 1500 calories for the next 8 weeks with the hope of losing around 1lb a week.

Since getting sick, I'm starting from scratch yet again, but I think this is a goal I can manage. And, while I'd love to be 30lbs lighter, 10lbs will make a huge difference in how I feel and look.

Along with getting back on the food track, I'm walking again, which also feels like starting all over again, but at least, I'm starting to get the habit back.

Another good tip from C. is on the outfit I should wear. She suggested I head to Chicos because they have a lot of non-wrinkle wear that is "forgiving" as she kindly put it. So, we plan a shopping trip at the end of September.

The lunch ended in sort of a blood-sister pact without the blood where we both are going to shoot for 1500 calories over the next 8 weeks.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

I Wana Be JJill

I love looking through the JJill catalog and dreaming of being 120 lbs and 5' 8". All the models in that catalog look so tall and lean, and of course, I like most of the clothes though I usually can only afford to buy an occassional t-shirt from there (on sale of course).

The latest catalog came about the same time I found out that the due dates for defending my dissertation are much sooner than I had expected. I was hoping to get a few pounds off by December, imagining myself gliding like a tiny winged fairy down the hall to be handed my diploma by some oger in a black robe.

But this degree requires that I stand up in front of a bunch of people (public invited even) and talk about how wonderful and brilliant my research has been, how I'm doing groundbreaking academic work that will change the face of the world as we know it today.

After my experience presenting the proposal for this dissertation, I know a little of what to expect:

  • First of all, the conference room will be located about 300 miles away from where I have to park. This will be after driving 2 1/2 hours to actually get to the campus.
  • Once I make it to the room, I will be a puddle of sweat and wrinkles, yes, even in Oct. or Nov. because this is Florida and I will be very (very) nervous.
  • Next, I'll need to set up my laptop, which of course will not work, and eventually, I'll have to turn to plan B and use the hand-outs, which I had lugged across campus along with my laptop.
  • Finally, I will give my presentation, talking way faster than I had anticipated and breathing heavily and sweating more, and I'll be asked a few questions that I can answer and a few that I will have no clue how to answer.

At this point, I have my draft finished and a lot of technical stuff to do to make sure it is formatted correctly and forms are filled out on time and such, but I can't help but consider, being the girly-girl that I am: What is a fat girl supposed to wear to a dissertation defense?

I will defnitely have to go shopping, which is going to suck. Hopefully, I'll get a few pounds off and at least down to the next size (which is still way bigger than I should be) by the time I have to hit the dreaded mall.

I'll be thinking of this while I go for a morning walk.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Bridget Jones

We watched Bridget Jones's Diary last night for the first time. I had seen bits and pieces of it on TV but never the whole movie, and one thing I was really surprised about what the fact that Rene Z. was supposed to have packed on a lot of weight for this role.

Now, I will admit she wasn't her normal teeny tiny self, but actually, she has a nice figure in this movie, and I couldn't help but wonder if those boobies came from the added weight or if it was just some Hollywood illusion going on, a special bra perhaps?

To add a little more confusion, the character writes in her diary that she is 136 lbs, which is I guess supposed to be huge. Now, sure, that is more than most people her height (which I think is around 5' 3") would like to weigh, but I was under the impression with all the Hollywood hub bub about her weight, that the character would be much heavier.

I thought Bridget was supposed to be a fact chick.

Instead, she was an adorable 30 something with a nice rack. Not skinny, but cute and, I thought, attractive.

Here's a picture of Rene as her regular skinny self. Cute, maybe even elegant, but not sporting exactly the same set of cha-chas as she did in the movie.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Advice from an Anorexic

I was talking to C. the other day, actually in reverse roles as I was giving her the pep talk for a change. She hasn't lost any more weight and knows it is because she's just eating more than she should. Now, back tracking here, she looks fabulous (which is what I told her among other things). But, she wants to get down to a size 4 and as she puts it she's a "fat size 6."

Now to me, "fat" and "6" don't actually go together, but she is a good deal shorter than I am, so I agree to be considered really thin versus normal size, 4 is probably a good size for her.

As we were talking, the subject of a friend of hers who lost a bunch of weight quickly (about 15 lbs in a month or so) came up and about how this woman was always able to get the weight off really quickly once she slipped a little. When C. asked her how she did it, not surprisingly she confessed to cutting back to about 1200 calories a day, exactly what C. told me NOT to do.

Furthermore, she told C. that one thing she found helpful were portein bars because she is so hungry that during the night she wakes up repeatedly. When she does so, she takes a few bits of a protein bar and is able to go back to sleep.

Now ignoring the part that someone is so hungry it wakes them up more than once during the night, we realized her protein bar idea had some possibilities. My "squeezing the banana" post is not an usual situation for me. Granted, I rarely get sick like this, but I'm sure I'm like most people when there are days where I'm running around and that usually equates (for me) to eating crap. Hell, a good 20lbs of what I need to lose I can say came from my years of commuting to school. It's nearly impossible to drive and eat salad. Now, french fries are a great driving food.

Protein bars are great for days when I'm working, but I need to run home and take the dogs out real quickly. With all the driving, there's no time to really eat. They would also be handy for the evenings when you may feel like munching all night. Protein bars are really filling, so they may curb that a little.

I bought just a few to try because of my delicate palette, and they taste okay. So far, I've tried the Atkins - Advantage Bar, which was about 220 calories and 19g of protein, and the Pria bar, which was a little smaller and 110 calories and 5g of protein. Yesterday, I used one while running around to get me through lunch and later had some fruit when I was able to sit and relax for a few minutes, and it filled me up but was only about a 300 calorie meal. So, not too bad.

I'll report back when I get some time to see if these help or not.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Don't Squeeze the Banana

My dad has this saying, "Don't squeeze the banana."

Basically, it means don't over do it. Because, just like squeezing a banana, you end up with a big mess.

I think last week I squeezed a little too much, and I'm still paying the price. So, I've decided to keep being careful about what I eat, but I'm going to try to take it a little easy when it comes to exercise and stuff right now.

It's week 4 and I still have a little cough and icky throat, achie legs, and I'm just plain tired. Last week I basically was so sick of being sick that I decided to just pretend like I wasn't. I cleaned like a nut, ran out to a few stores for things for the house and special food items for our guests, and this is in addition to all my regular writing work load.

This week I started pretty much at the same pace on Monday thinking I'd start up my walks again. I also spend the whole day banging away on my dissertation, so even though I knew I was tired, I just kept at it.

Finally, last night, I decided to say "Uncle" already. I didn't drink any wine, went to bed early, and today I let myself take a long nap, and I'm already starting to feel just a wee bit better.